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Political Jokes

There are 190 Political jokes in this category. Prev 5 | Next 5

Quotation for 1993 (American political humor) (Added On: 2017-08-18 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

The State of American political rhetoric:

"The plan is really a Doctor Kevorkian prescription for the jobs of American working men and women." Rep. Richard Armey, R-Texas, on the Clinton health care proposal.

At a congressional hearing Armey pledged to Hillary Clinton to make the health care debate exciting. Mrs. Clinton replied, "I'm sure you will do that, you and Doctor Kevorkian."

"If you think health care is expensive now, wait until it's free." humorist P.J. O'Rourke.

"The people of the 5th district of Georgia did not send me here to sell them out for a mess of pottage (sic) and 30 (sic) pieces of silver." Democratic Rep. John Lewis, saying no to NAFTA.

Understatement of the year: "I spun myself out of control." Republican consultant Edward Rollins on his post-election statements about suppressing black voter turnout in the New Jersey governor's race.

"If we're going to prepare them for what goes on in the front seat, we ought to prepare them for goes on in the back seat." Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders on driver's education and sex education.

"The scariest and the most dangerous part of (Endeavor space shuttle) mission occurs this week, when the astronauts return to Florida and pick up their rental cars." Jay Leno.

"You need three things to be a successful pundit: an inexhaustible supply of effrontery, a short memory and the ability to spell the word 'Armageddon.'" Canadian journalist Gynne Dyer. If that is so, then we don't have to worry about Dan Quayle becoming a famous columnist.

But then there is Rush Limbaugh. "Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and just think to yourself, 'I am just full of hot gas?'" David Letterman questioning Rush Limbaugh who was on Letterman's show promoting his best-selling book *I Told You So*.

"I was not meant for the job or the spotlight of public life in Washington. Here, ruining people is considered sport." From Vincent Foster's suicide note, White House deputy counsel at the time.

Washington, Nixon, & Clinton (Added On: 2017-08-14 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Q: What is the difference between George Washington, Richard Nixon, and Bill Clinton?A: Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Clinton doesn't knowthe difference!

Clinton one-liner (Added On: 2017-08-12 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Voter: "The joke's over, bring back Bush."

Question and answer Clinton joke (Added On: 2017-08-12 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Q: What is the difference between liberalism and socialism?
A: Socialism is dead.

Top Ten Surreal, Scary, or Stupid Situations (Added On: 2017-08-05 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Remake of "Roots" starring Michael Jackson
Performance of "The Nutcracker" by the Bolshoi Ballet with special guest Hillary Clinton
The Martha Stewart WWF Smackdown
Any sitcom starring Emeril Lagasse
Jerry Falwell napping with a Teletubby stuffed toy
Any day in the life of the British royalty
Ricky Martin in a tasteful, hot pink, off-the-shoulder number
Bill Gates on a Harley Davidson
Yet another commercial starring Carrot Top
Osama bin Laden in a Christian Science bookstore

There are 190 Political jokes in this category. Prev 5 | Next 5

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