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A + JOKES

Welcome to A + Jokes - Your online resource for funny and hilarious jokes. See the 5 latest jokes added here. Browse the menu on the left for category based jokes. Check out the comic strip section where you can find many cartoons updated on a daily basis and weekly basis.

Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle East? (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar.


The One About The Lottery Winner (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


A man walked into a stockbroker's office and said to the receptionist, "I just won some money in the lottery, and I want to open an account with your %**!&%! company." Heads turned in shock at hearing the man's language. "I'm sorry, but we don't allow that kind of talk here," the receptionist said. "You'll have to leave." "I told you I want to open an account with this %**!&%! company." the man insisted. Suddenly the manager came out. "What's all the swearing about?" he asked. "I just won $12 million and I want to open an account with your %**!&%! company," the man replied. "Oh, I see," said the manager. "And these %**!&%! people are giving you a hard time?"


Insults (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


You're so ugly, yo momma had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get the dog to play with you.

Yo momma's so fat that the last time that she wore a T-shirt with a X on it a helicopter tried to land on her.

Your dog is so dumb that if you were to cut off his tail and make him walk backwards he'd start wagging his head!


You know you're a Teacher if... (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


You think people should be required to get a government permit before being allowed to reproduce.

You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to have all your holidays and summers free."

You believe "shallow gene pool" should have it's own box on the report card.

You believe the staff room should have a Valium salt lick.

When out in public, you feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior.

When you mention "vegetables" and you're not talking about a food group.

You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.

You wonder how some parents even managed to reproduce.

You can't have children of your own, because there is no name you could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure the moment you heard it.

You really encourage an obnoxious parent to check into home schooling.


A (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


A device for catching zoids.


Question and answer blonde joke (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


Q: How do you measure a blonde's intelligence?
A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!


Wedding practical joke (Added On: 2017-11-22 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)


A secret pregnant loverAt the rehearsal dinner for my boss' daughter and son-in-law-to-be, a loud eight-months pregnant teenage girl suddenly appeared at the back of the room screaming ten minutes worth of curses that would befall the groom if he didn't marry the pregnant girl like he promised. It was set up by the boss' wife, and I am told that the groom very nearly burst into tears protesting his innocence.


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