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Three Construction Workers (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
Three guys work on a constuction site. One is white, one is black and one is Polish. The bell rings for lunch and the white man opens his lunchbag and sighs deeply, saying, ''If my wife packs me a ham sandwich again tomorrow I'm jumping off the building.'' The black guy opens up his lunch, glares and says '' If my wife packs me a ham sandwich again tomorrow, I'm going with you." The Polish man opens his lunch, pulls out another ham sandwich, and says ''I'm with you guys.''
The next day the lunch bell rings.The white man opens his lunch. He says, ''Turkey sandwich. I love my wife.'' The black guy opens his lunch. He says, ''Chicken sandwich. I love my wife. The Polish man opened his lunchbox, looked stricken, and said '' See ya guys.'' With that, he jumped off the building. The black guy says '' I feel sorry for him. ''The white man replies, ''Why?'' The black guy said, ''Because he packs his own lunch.'
Airplane passengers (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
Heard from a friend who heard it in Arkansas.
This man and this woman are riding next to each other in first class. The man
sneezes, pulls out his wang and wipes the tip off. The woman can't believe
what she just saw and decides she is hallucinating.
A few minutes pass. The man sneezes again. He pulls out his wang and wipes
the tip off. The woman is about to go nuts. She can't believe that
such a rude person exists. A few minutes pass. The man sneezes yet again.
He takes his wang out and wipes the tip off. The woman has finally had
enough. She turns to the man and says, "Three times you've sneezed, and
three times you've removed your penis from your pants to wipe it off!
What the hell kind of degenerate are you?"
The man replies, "I am sorry to have disturbed you, ma'am. I have a very rare
condition such that when I sneeze, I have an orgasm." The woman then says,
"Oh, how strange. What are you taking for it?"
The man looks at her and says, "Pepper."
The Watch (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
Jack has stolen the rabbi's gold watch and afterwards felt guilty about what he did.
After a sleepless night, he went to the rabbi.
"Rabbi, I stole a gold watch."
"But Jack, that's forbidden! You should return it immediately!"
"What shall I do?
"Give it back to the owner."
"Do you want it?"
"No, I said return it to its owner."
"But he doesn't want it." "
"In that case, you can keep it."
How do you make a blonde laugh on a Saturday? (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Sorry for eating the peanuts (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table.Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he's absentmindedly finished the entire bowl. "I'm so sorry, auntie, I've eaten all of your peanuts!""That's okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I've sucked the chocolate off, I don't care for them anyway."
What do you call a handcuffed man? (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
You're a Redneck if... (Added On: 2017-04-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)
You Might Be A Redneck... ...If your dad walks u to school 'cause youre in the same grade! ...If u mow the grass and find the car! ...If someone comes to your house everyday thinking you're having a garage sale! ...If u sell the car 4 gas money!
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